Principle 10 also causes us to grow in love. Love is the power of the Christian’s walk and life. In the letter to the Romans (12:9-21) we see the action of love. In the letter to the Galatians (5:22-23) we see the nature of love. In these next verses in the letter to the Corinthians (13:4-8a), we see the character of love.
The Meaning of Biblical Love
The primary meaning of the word love in Scripture is a purposeful commitment to sacrificial action for another. In fact, loving God is demonstrated by obeying His Word (John 14:15, 21, 23-24; 1 John 5:3; 2 John 1:6). Powerful emotions may accompany biblical love, but it is the commitment of the will that holds love steadfast and unchanging. Emotions may change, but a commitment to love in a biblical manner endures and is the hallmark of a disciple of Jesus Christ (John 3:16, 13:34-35; Romans 5:8-11; 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a, 13).
Love has specific characteristics demonstrated by godly deeds (thoughts, words, and actions) (1 Corinthians 13:4-8a). The test of biblical love is to do the following, especially when you don’t feel like it (Matthew 5:46-48).
1. LOVE IS PATIENT, even when you feel like forcefully expressing yourself. Love bears pain or trials without complaint, shows forbearance under provocation or strain, and is steadfast despite opposition, difficulty, or adversity. LOVE IS PATIENT.
2. LOVE IS KIND, even when you want to retaliate physically or tear down another with your words. Love is sympathetic, considerate, gentle, and agreeable. LOVE IS KIND.
3. LOVE IS NOT JEALOUS, especially when you are aware that others are being noticed more than you. Love does not participate in rivalry, is not hostile toward one believed to enjoy an advantage, and is not suspicious. Love works for the welfare and good of the other. LOVE IS NOT JEALOUS.
4. LOVE DOES NOT BRAG, even when you want to tell the world about your accomplishments. Love does not flaunt itself boastfully and does not engage in self-glorification. Instead, love lifts (builds up) others. LOVE DOES NOT BRAG.
5. LOVE IS NOT ARROGANT, even when you think you are right and others are wrong. Love does not assert itself or become overbearing in dealing with others. LOVE IS NOT ARROGANT.
6. LOVE DOES NOT ACT UNBECOMINGLY, even when being boastful, rude, or overbearing will get you attention and allow you to get your own way. Love conforms to what is right, fitting, and appropriate to the situation in order to honor the Lord. LOVE DOES NOT ACT UNBECOMINGLY.
7. LOVE DOES NOT SEEK ITS OWN, even when you feel like grabbing it all or have an opportunity to do so. Love does not try to fulfill its own desires, does not ask for its own way, and does not try to acquire gain for itself. Love, as an act of the will, seeks to serve and not to be served. LOVE DOES NOT SEEK ITS OWN.
8. LOVE IS NOT PROVOKED, even when others attempt to provoke you or you are tempted to strike out at something or someone. Love is not aroused or incited to outbursts of anger. Love continues faithfully and gently to train others in righteousness, even when they fail. LOVE IS NOT PROVOKED.
9. LOVE DOES NOT TAKE INTO ACCOUNT A WRONG SUFFERED, even when everyone seems to be against you or when people openly attack you. Love does not hold a grudge against someone. Love forgives, chooses not to bring up past wrongs in accusation or retaliation, does not return evil for evil, and does not indulge in self-pity. Love covers a multitude of sins. LOVE DOES NOT TAKE INTO ACCOUNT A WRONG SUFFERED.
10. LOVE DOES NOT REJOICE IN UNRIGHTEOUSNESS, even when it seems like a misfortune was exactly what another person deserved. Love mourns over sin, its effects, and the pain which results from living in a fallen world. Love seeks to reconcile others with the Lord. LOVE DOES NOT REJOICE IN UNRIGHTEOUSNESS.
11. LOVE REJOICES WITH THE TRUTH, even when it is easier and more profitable, materially, to lie. Love is joyful when truth is known, even when it may lead to adverse circumstances, reviling, or persecution. LOVE REJOICES WITH THE TRUTH.
12. LOVE BEARS ALL THINGS, even when disappointments seem overwhelming. Love is tolerant, endures with others who are difficult to understand or deal with, and has an eternal perspective in difficulties. Love remembers that God develops spiritual maturity through difficult circumstances. LOVE BEARS ALL THINGS.
13. LOVE BELIEVES ALL THINGS, even when others’ actions are ambiguous and you feel like not trusting anyone. Love accepts trustfully, does not judge people’s motives, and believes others until facts prove otherwise. Even when facts prove that the other person is untrustworthy, love seeks to help restore the other to trustworthiness. LOVE BELIEVES ALL THINGS.
14. LOVE HOPES ALL THINGS, even when nothing appears to be going right. Love expects fulfillment of God’s plan and anticipates the best for the other person. Love confidently entrusts others to the Lord to do His sovereign and perfect will in their lives. LOVE HOPES ALL THINGS.
15. LOVE ENDURES ALL THINGS, especially when you think you just can’t endure the people or circumstances in your life. Love remains steadfast under suffering or hardship without yielding and returns a blessing while undergoing trials. LOVE ENDURES ALL THINGS.
16. LOVE NEVER FAILS, even when you feel overwhelmed and the situation seems hopeless. Love will not crumble under pressure or difficulties. Love remains selflessly faithful, even to the point of death. LOVE NEVER FAILS.
The portion “Love Is” is copied from pages 217 to 219 in the Self-Confrontation manual, which is written and published by the Biblical Counseling Foundation (BCF). Although BCF has granted permission to copy this portion from their materials, this does not imply that the Biblical Counseling Foundation is in agreement with, or in any way associated with this organization.
We have a long way to go but this is the mark that we must aim for. Let us not be discouraged in doing good. God will bless our efforts, and we must not shrink back just because it gets hard or uncomfortable. When the vice of love squeezes us, it produces more grace from within us.